Do you know exactly how powerful you are at creating what you want?

I'm getting a better sense of it everyday

This morning while I was sitting outside a bluejay came to visit.

It was a young jay and without fear. As it watched me drinking tea, it came closer to the point of sitting on the back of my chair and then landing on the table beside me. I offered her some of my banana that she took to the chair beside me and tried it.

She was curious and willing to try what I offered. Cautious, yes, but willing.

I went inside for seed and came back out to find her gone. Only she returned again, straight to the table to try the seed. And she stayed a while.

What a truly beautiful moment.

As I sat there taking it in, I realized that this moment, sitting in the cool shade of my backyard trees watching the birds at their feeders, was birthed 20 years ago.

Twenty years ago I lived in a lovely home with a large yard with one enormous old growth oak way out in the back yard. The back of my home faced west and the blistering heat of Texas summers melted any desire to enjoy the outdoors.

I’d imagine trees closer in, offering shade. I planted a few too, but it would be years before they would offer shade.

The next house I moved to had lovely trees in the backyard which was also west facing. And within two years, due to age and drought, they were all gone. So again I found myself envisioning trees.

There have been two more homes since, each one wide open to the sun.

This current home arrived at the end of 2017 and has held my family as we’ve moved through new beginnings. Two boys off to college. The transition to a new beginning for my daughter and me after a divorce.

I remember when I first saw it, walking through the front door and seeing the floor-to-ceiling windows out to a backyard filled with a mott of live oaks. It was spectacular and drew me in. But it was not the reason we purchased the house. It was a side benefit.

Back then, I didn’t have the time or presence to notice the way creation was unfolding. I was simply grateful to have found a home that would hold my family well as a lease was expiring.

Now, that I’ve created more balance and alignment in my life… now that I’m one year out from a finalized divorce… now that my daughter is stepping into her independence… I have moments with myself that give me the time to see and sense beyond.

The visit from the jay brought tears. Of deep love. Of awareness that this single moment was birthed many years ago, and nurtured quietly by my soul, before I was able and willing to give it to myself.

I also sensed the way it had been waiting, over the past 6 years while I’ve lived in this home, for me to truly witness and own my capacity to create.

I could see the ways I’d been living a life that didn’t allow for creation to happen. Not in ease, that’s for sure.

After all, creation is always happening for us. We choose the nature and tone of creation as it happens. I’d been choosing hard and constricted for so long I was completely undone by the easy trust of the blue jay.

I don’t think many of us are truly aware of just how much power we have over our creation. That the nature and tone of what is happening to us, through us and for us is of our choosing.

We choose if it is ease-full. We choose if we see and acknowledge a moment in grace or in displeasure. We choose if it unfolds quickly or in stops and starts. We choose to have support to see and own our power in our creation.

I’ve been learning this in deeper and deeper ways. Seeing each moment, each unexpected event, in a new light. I see more possibilities. More than we often give ourselves permission to have.

I invite you to stop for a moment. Sit quietly in your happy place. And notice.

What have you created yourself to? Can you acknowledge how you’ve brought yourself here? What do you notice about how you want to create forward?

I’d love if you’d share what you discover.

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We have one more week to go before enrollment for Emergence closes.

If you’d like support - practical, spiritual and energetic support - for what you are creating and the way you are creating, it’s time to schedule a conversation. That’s what we will be focusing on as a group, as well as amplifying each other as we grow.

For all the details, go here. Enrollment closes August 15.